Verbal Vomit

words are flowing out like endless rain into a paper cup
they slither while they pass they slip away across the universe
pools of sorrow waves of joy are drifting through my open mind
possessing and caressing me.....nothing gonna change my world.....nothing's gonna change my world. nothings gonna change my world

images of broken light which dance before me like a million eyes they call all along across the universe.

Gotta love the Beatles.



SO ever have one of those moments, that turns into one of those minutes, eventually becoming an hour quickly moving to a sequence clearly becoming one of those days

I'm having one.

Or I guess by the time you read this, it's over of I've had one, or perhaps worse stuck in one of those weeks.

I'm keeping up with the cliched speeches to myself.

I've righting myself a few times

Figured the triggers which cause the mood

Identified factors of anxiety,

Unveiled some hidden emotions

Addressed some personal responsibilities

attempted to set my self up for success.

but the days seem long

the Hours mesh

my body

my mind

they don't cooperate

I accelerate

I'm going too fast

I get sick

I get off

My body strobes, pulses with waves of crooked energy, angst...caffeine in the system- boy have I learned it doesn't help me.

Restlessness, excitement, melancholy mobilizations of self doubt

Followed by barrages of affirmations.

I doubt my two feet are firmly safely upon the ground at the moment

Not lost, just not sure.

Controlling what I can control...ah such a life saver, because nothing else really matters they make for frustrating thoughts.


Then I remember I had Kentucky Fried Chicken this evening...following it up with a chocolate covered macadamia nut bar, followed by a pretty strong ass cup of Joe....

my belly distended, too weak to move, my hands hurt from massaging my patients, my wrist on my left hand is still on fire from all of the special ointment I use to treat muscle but leave on my forearm like paint on a painter's pallette for easy use, instead it leaves it cold tingly and numb.

2 rolaids, 2 advils, 1 shower, 1 beatles album....

I should just vomit. how the mind swirls when I feel like this. it's like a baby bellyache, the poor thing doesn't know any better and doesn't know how to interrpret the feelings going on....I cry silent tears.

I pull a hair out from my nose, fearing bats in the cave. I sneeze big big big time...

the sneeze feels great somehow and I actually enjoy the strange aftershock and the smell of the sneeze.

Not sure I welcome the sleep....craziest of dreams await me....trying to figure out what they all mean....

Woke up got out of bed, dragged a comb across my head
Made my way downstairs and drank a cup
and looking up I noticed I was late.....I read the news today oh boy.